Little Drummer Boy

Come they told me, pa rum pum pum pum
A new born King to see, pa rum pum pum pum
Our finest gifts we bring, pa rum pum pum pum
To lay before the King, pa rum pum pum pum,
rum pum pum pum, rum pum pum pum,

So to honor Him, pa rum pum pum pum,
When we come.

Little Baby, pa rum pum pum pum
I am a poor boy too, pa rum pum pum pum
I have no gift to bring, pa rum pum pum pum
That's fit to give the King, pa rum pum pum pum,
rum pum pum pum, rum pum pum pum,

Shall I play for you, pa rum pum pum pum,
On my drum?

Mary nodded, pa rum pum pum pum
The ox and lamb kept time, pa rum pum pum pum
I played my drum for Him, pa rum pum pum pum
I played my best for Him, pa rum pum pum pum,
rum pum pum pum, rum pum pum pum,

Then He smiled at me, pa rum pum pum pum
Me and my drum.

Ok so I have a huge fascination with this song. Usually people laugh at me and think its kind of nerdy that I love it so much. Some renditions of the song are not so great, but some are. My favorite is the version by Josh Groban, it is so powerful and moving. I was listening to it today and was honestly brought to tears by it. It was speaking to me SO much. The rhythm and the beats, the choir and the rising crescendos, the lyrics and the spirit that moves my spirit. AH! So, as I was brought to tears by this beautiful melody, I was asking God, "What is it abou thtis song that resonates with my core." Then I heard my Daddy answer me and He said "Morgan, nothing pleases me more than when you worship ME with the gifts I have given you." And I realized this song is not about a little drummer boy, its about me. Its my cry. I look at my life and I ask my Daddy "What can I give You that is worth what You did for me...I have no gift to bring, thats fit for a King??" There is nothing. There are no earthly things, no frankincense or myrrh, that I can bring Him that is worthy of who He is. But He gave me a drum so to speak, He gave me my art, He gave me my passion, and there is no higher form of worship then when I worship Him with my art, with every passion inside of me. "So to honor Him..." "I played my drum for Him [I painted for Him], I played my best for Him [i drew my best for Him]....Then He smiled at me, me and my drum [me and my art]." The little drummer boy didnt have anyhting He could bring, but He could use his gift and play his best. And when I paint and worship my Daddy I feel HIm smile at me becuase its the highest gift I could bring.

"Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand" -The Velveteen Rabbit

Cry like the rain, break through the clouds. Shower us with Your face, break through our refrains. And You'll rain and You'll rain and You'll rain, and we'll put our umbrellas away. And we'll let every tear hit our face, every passion of Yours wrapped up in this wet embrace. We'll splash in the puddles and declare that we're drenched. Drenched in You, drenched in Your face. We get lost in those eyes so deep, we drown until normal air slips away. We don't want this air anyways, its normal, its average, and sometimes we forget we're breathing. We desire air that is fairer. Air that is clearer. Air that always reminds us what we are, who we are and where we are. Air that we consciously breath. Air that breathes into us. Air that cannot be found until we drown. Life in death. Freedom in surrender. Joy in tears. Beauty in Ashes. Fire in rain. Light me on fire and I'll drown in Your rain. I'll catch these other ones on fire. These others who are wet, we'll burn together. And we'll swim and we'll burn. They say it can't be done, but those that say that don't breathe this air. We live in a different dimension, with different expressions, flying in intercepting directions. So we'll breathe, and we'll drown, and we'll burn. Can you hear it? Its the breathing, its the drowning, its the burning. Can you feel it? Its the breathe, the water on your skin, the fire igniting your heart. Can you resist this? Its the wind, its the waves, its the flames. Can you see HIm? He's like wind, He's like rain, He's like fire. Can you become Him? I'm like wind, I'm like rain, I'm like fire. And I'm burning cuz He's breathing. And I'm drowning because He's raining.

1. Started my own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than I can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sung a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched lightening at sea
14. Taught myself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown my own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitchhiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of my ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught myself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing (indoor)
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had my portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had my picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Rode an elephant

more

And I keep waiting, and You keep invading
All I hear is Your voice, with the birds, serenading
Every passion in me now participating
Your love for me is so invigorating
As I am waiting, please keep invading

This was for a friend

A WEDDING
They asked me if I could see her. They asked me if I could hear her. They asked me if I felt her. But I just sat with no clue. “See who? Hear who? Feel who?” They looked at me as if I should know, as if it was as clear as flowers when they grow. And then they turned my gaze and pointed, they pointed at her- the anointed. I’ve seen this girl, I know this girl, she’s the one who dances in freedom and grace, the one with a shining, unveiled face. Then they told me I should come, just follow the sound of her beating drum. And as I heard the rhythm I was swept and into another Kingdom I stepped. And now clearly I see her, she’s the one all dressed in white. She’s the one He’s holding tight, worth every fight, face shining bright, standing straight and right. She’s the one that is His delight and He, her shining Knight, for her He conquered the blackest night. And I see her where she stands and I can hear every note their love demands. No more castles made of sand but on His victory they surely stand, holding hands, ruling lands, this lover and His bride my attention commands. And now clearly I can also hear her. She’s the one that is singing, can’t you hear the marriage bells are ringing? Can you feel the power this covenant is bringing? On His every word she’s clinging, in His arms forever swinging. And now clearly I can also feel her. This love so pure, my emotions stir. He’s dumping out all His love to her, His precious dove, His only love. And He’s drawing her face in the clouds above. And everything about her, He freely boasts of. So here comes the bride, all pure and white. Here comes her desire, all wrapped in fire. Closer and closer to the altar she comes, faster and faster towards her He runs. And wrapped up in one beautiful kiss, all of earth’s unimaginable bliss surely there is nothing sweeter than this. And I watch as they go, dancing and singing, twirling and being, creating and releasing. He completing her and in Him everything she ever hoped for. She, the reason He didn’t fight dying, and He, the only reason she is living, flying. I heard there is going to be a wedding, and it was to hers today that we all went heading, to get caught up in their love as its spreading. And as we sing this wedding song, and witness love ten thousand cords strong, we all get swept along, surely its in His arms that we all belong. What a joy it was today to witness everything their love portrays, close enough to smell her flower bouquet, to watch her smile as they sway, and see His eyes with her face on display, do we ever have to go away? But this was her day, and I know its here that she will stay, watching colors fade from gray, it’s the place she sneaks to everyday, it’s the field where the bride and the Groom will forever play.

...

and i keep waiting....and You keep invading

some thoughts on playgrounds

Push me Daddy as I swing, listen Daddy as I sing. You hold me dear, You hold me near, in Your arms I laugh at fear. Up and down, all around, in this playground of Your love. Tag “your it” scream angels from above. Ring-around-the-Rosy, a pocket full of posies, ashes, ashes, we all fall down. Ring-around-my-Daddy, changes all the posies, beauty, beauty, I get my crown.. You run this way, I run that way. I catch You and we play. Hide and Seek with Papas eyes, I’ll find You easy, You’re my prize. On this swing I sit and wonder, if its possible to go higher. So Push me Daddy as I swing, listen Daddy as I sing.

Testimony of the Week

So God has really been speaking to me lately about stepping out and taking risks and really just being obedient to His voice. But He has also showing me that sometimes He'll make it really easy to hear His voice and take that risk. Here's a pretty cool story from this week:

Friday morning I was driving to work, texting a good friend of mine about all that God was doing in my life and just releasing life and love and joy over her life [you gotta love those drive by text messages], and as I pulled into the parking garage one of my Co-workers called me. When I picked up the phone she asked if I could turn around and drive back down to the entrance of my job to pick up a lady who seemed to just have experienced a heart attack. My immediate reaction was "well, shouldn't you call an ambulance??" But apparently, she refused to be picked up by one and so they offered my services to take her. SO I drove down and they waddled her out to my car [her name was Carol and she is actually a regular at my store]. So as I was driving her to the hospital I was praying to myself and listening to my fave worship mix in the background when I realized "Um, HELLO MORGAN!!! Diving encounter for healing just sat itself in the passenger seat of your car." So thats when I decided to build up my courage and just straight up ask if I could pray out loud the entire way to the hospital. I mean, it was my car I could do what I wanted, and in the state she was in, I didn't forsee her jumping out of the car in utter haste to get away. Well, after I asked her if I could pray she informed that she was a Chrisitian and that she would love nothing more than my prayers. So I began praying for healing, and I don't think she was used to my kind of prayers...but they worked. She started crying again but this time it was peace and joy and hope and you could feel the tension just lift out of the car. So I prayed and "Healer" was playing in the background and finally we pulled into the ER. I go in, holding her stuff and waiting with her as she gets checked in. Now this lady has a had a rough couple of years. Her husband and her dad all died last year within a month of eachother and last June her brother experienced massive heart attacks that left him basically paralised and incapable of functioning properly. SO she really had no one. SO I sat in the ER room with her for two hours while they did tests trying to figure out what was wrong. Finally, I had to go back to work so I left, wondering what the results would say. This morning, I ran into Carol. She strode right into my work as chipper as can be and PERFECTLY fine. She said that the doctors told her that she did indeed have a heart attach but they couldn't explain that why, now, her body was functioning as if it was 20 years younger than it was. She is now TOO healthy!!! COME ON JESUS!!!!!!!!! I TOTALLY believe it was because of that divine oppurtunity and those moments in my car praying and seeking the Lord for healing, that she was healed. It jsut goes to show that sometimes, God wants to do something in someone's life so bad, that He'll just sit em down right next to ya until you have no choice but to release the presence of God into their life!!!

Lately...

Hey everyone! Little update time from the life of Morgan :) God has been so so so so good to me lately. He has been showing me how INCREDIBLE He is. The great thing about this relationship with Jesus is that there is not end, it never stops and I ALWAYS realize there is SO much deeper to go. But the crazy thing about that is, its not overwhelming, its exhilarating.

So here's the rundown:

Last Sunday, my car got broken into. My driver side window was smashed and mr. robber got my backpack with my phone, wallet, ipod, schoolbooks and Bible. Talk about a downer :) Yup, it pretty much sucked. There is nothing quite like the feeling of getting your stuff stolen from you, very violating. SO I went through the week wondering why God let this happen to me. [God always has a reason you know :)] SO, I got right on buying a new phone, trying to figure out how to get another id, ordering new books, telling myself i might not have an ipod for a while and just flat out relinquished hope of having my Bible again. SO the week went by and I got over it and accepted it- trusting and believing that GOd was still good. So, Saturday morning, after many prayers to get my stuff back by me and others, I went to leave for work. I put on a coat that I haven't worn for a couple months and started going downstairs. The coat felt a little heavy so i went to see what was in the pocket, and sure enough, it was my wallet!! Out of nowhere, my wallet just appeared!!! AAAHAHA!! God had a great laugh over that one! So the next day, Barco had planned a get together with all of our great friends. This dinner had been planned for a week but I wasn't sure if I was going to go. Veronica was having a birthday party and I was just flat out tired, plus I was carless cuz I was having my window fixed. But, I ended up going. As I walked into Red RObin, I noticed that our small group had become probably close to thirty people and the entire right side of red robin was devoted to us. My first response was "Oh great now I have to be EXTRA social." But I sat down across from Aime and we had a jolly ol time. Halfway through Jerbarco came over and pulled me up and dragged me to the middle of the table and everyone got quit. At this point I was like "Ok what is going on???" And he preceeded to tell me that all of these people were here to bless me after what happened to me and he gave me a card with $340 in it!!!! I was beyond shocked and I think I am still in shock! Then I got home and James [who had just been in Redding] dropped by with Todd, to give me something he obtained in Redding. Melissa [an amazing woman of God who is fast becoming a good friend] prophetically collaged a notebook for me and in the notebook were about 11 pages of prophetic words that she had gotten random people in Redding to write in. SO really the whole night was like this giant, fat blessing and I realized how much God loves me. He cares about what happens and He gives everything back that was taken! So I got money to buy most of the things I had stolen and I realized how amazing the friends were He put in my life. So my truck getting broken into, I am glad it happened, becuase now I have this amazing picture of who God is. He cares, He loves and He is ALWAYS good!!

So with this recent election and Obama being preseident, it isn't exactly what I wanted to happen but the great thing is, is that God is the same God yesterday, today and tomorrow. He is SO AMAZING!!! I just can't get over how good He is. I have faith that our nation will turn and become one natin under God again!! I am about to explode with love for God right now and i think I am going to go worship.....be blasted with the goodness of God!!!

A taste of what is to come...

SO in our underground group we are embarking on a journey. Its a journey to seek and to find the Lords heart. Its a journey to hear, to really HEAR the prophetic cry of our generation right now. Our group of 25 is broken into artists, dancers, writers and musicians. We are spending the next few weeks creating one piece that personifies what the cry of our generation is right now. Tonight was our first night and I am PUMPED for what God is doing. I had chills the whole night. Gods presence was really thick and resting so incredibly heavy on us, i think i could have stayed there all night. We soaked for the first half of undergrounds and God met us there. I have never before been able to write, or to dream so freely in my life. Usually my tendency would be to go with the art group, because that is what I am naturally inclined to do, but I feel like God is challenging me to give more and to take risks so I joined the writing group. And I LOVE IT. If anything else this night has encouraged me to write more and see what God wants to say, not only through my drawings but through my pen. I am so excited about what God gave me to write and what He gave all the other girls. Unfortunately I don't have a copy of all the other girls, but I thought I would give you a little teaser of what is to come. This is just the beginning. The beginning of a story perhaps, perhaps the beginning of a transformation. Who knows what God wants to do...perhaps He wants to change the world. I believe it. So here is what I wrote tonight, check back in one month for the culmination of the arts: the rest of this story, a prophetic song, a prophetic dance and a prophetic art piece. God is doing big things...join in :)
"I gathered them all, I gathered them in a room. The room is dark, it is cold, it is empty. I gathered them so I could hear, I gathered them so I could see, I gathered them and they came. Most of them said that they are a lot like this room they stand in: cold, dark, empty. Well, that's why I brought them here. I want to test that statement. Cold is the absence of warmth, darkness is the absence of light, and emptiness, some would say, is the absence of life. So if they are all of these things then what is absent? What is missing? Heat? Light? Life?

This is my room. This is my desire: to see the room become warmth, light and explode with life. These are my test subjects, these are the ones I want to see catch on fire, become light and personify life. This is my experiment, this is my study. But it's not science, it's a dream. It's a dream to see transformation in the most unlikely of places..."

...to be continued.

Alright Alirght Alright...I'm sorry!!!

So I have come to the realization that I am a horrible blogger. Its been several months since I have blogged and yet I still have no idea what to even blog about. But I will get better I promise.

A few months ago Kati sent me a quote that has changed the way I view art. "In order to create great art, something that reaches beyond time and space, you must find someone who isn't beuatiful and show them that they are. Paint the broken and the unlovely and make them believe!" So a lot of you have probably already heard that quote just from being around me, but what you don't know is the revelation it has given me. Our generation is a generation crying out to be loved for who they are, to be seen for what is inside of them instead of the coverings they hide behind. They long to be seen as beautiful, they long to be loved, they cry out to be heard. But I know for me, I don't want to associate with them. My heart doesn't break for their hearts...not to the degree their Father's heart breaks. But when I heard this quote I saw this paining that I posted up above. The picture of a girl, crying because of so much pain but really crying out of a desire to be seen. And then the revelation came to me that I may not care when she cries, but God cares. That every tear she cries, God sees and calls precious because every tear cried is not in vain. I want Gods heart for the broken and unlovely in our generation. I want His heart for the ones that are crying. I want His heart so that I can call them beautiful and make them believe that they are!

For the next explanation of a paining and the process I wil do one that became a lot of peoples favorites..."Love waits, then it flies". A little diddy that came to me one day when frustrated with the whole process of courtship. Sometimes as a girl, we just want to know. And sometimes, if we are honest, dating appeals to us because then at least we would know. We would know if we're attractive, we would know if we are likable, we would know if we are loved. But I also realize that dating brings a whirl wind of hurt and I would never ever chose another route than the one I have chosen. But sometimes Norah JOnes comes on at Starbucks, or a good chic flick comes on, or the leaves start changing colors and the first snowfall of the season happens, or maybe a good friend gets married and sometimes with all the romance in the air, you have to remember what you are waiting for. You are waiting to fly. But you can't fly properly if your wings aren't grown. "Don't awaken love before its time" or maybe "Don't fly before you're wings are ready" . Because love waits SO that it can fly. :)

Thats all I have time to discuss at the moment but I promise I will be way more faithful!!

A recent find from MC years

This is the testimony that I wrote and delivered during my MC and Extern year. I thought it was so fun to read back on it and remember what God has done in my life and through the lives of everyone who tossed and turned over writing the perfect testimony:

"Hi my name is Morgan and I am going to tell you about my 18 year long game of hide and seek. I have grown up in the church all my life so one would that I would not have to search so long to discover God as my father but it took me 18 years. I knew Him s an idea, as a concept, even as an Almighty Judge, Ruler and Creator but not as someone who loves me. Because I didn't see Him as my Father, I didn't act as His daughter. I became a "tomboy" from about ages 7 through 15. I wore boys clothes, did boy things and in imaginary games, I was the leading man. I was, in essence, one of the guys. I didn't realize that God loved me and called me to be His princess. His daughter of destiny. It didn't even occur to me that every time I made a wish to be a boy, it grieved His fathering heart. Deep down every little girl just wants to be wrapped in a hug and told they are loved and are beautiful but those words scared me. I didn't think anyone could love me, I didn't think I was beautiful, I didn't think I was a daughter and I didn't want to be a princess. I came into MC's and I could feel God calling me just to be a little girl again but I put a wall up against it. People would try to hug me or tell me I was pretty but I would reject them. It was the best day when I finally heard God telling me He loved me, I felt Him wrap me up in a giant bear hug and say "Welcome Home Morgan", when I saw Him as my Father and He called me Princess. I found that inner spot that did want to be held, that did want to be called beautiful, that did want to be loved. Now I want to be His little girl, His daughter, His princess, His joy and delight. Its what makes me want to live for Him because there is nothing like His love. I finally reached the finale of my 18 year long game of hide and seek and the thing I discovered was that God wasn't hiding. He was right in front of me I just didn't want to see Him. It was Him who found me."

I guess people still read....

So I found out people still read my blog, thank you! It is good to know that I have such wonderful friends that will stick with my unfaithful bloginess til the end!

The Lord has been speaking to me about seeing and what it means to be a seer. So I did this expriement and I entitled it "The Way I See it" :)

The Way I See It #1


When I see people, I see who they are called to be. I see that they were given wings, i see that they were not meant to stay grounded and habitate this world. I see that they are called to fly!

The Way I See It #2

When I look at the sky I don't see clouds, I don't see rain, I don't see sun, I don't see blue as you would think I should see blue. When I look towards the heavens I see glory invading this earth.

The Way I See It #3

"May your heart break enough so compassion enters in. May your strength all be spent on the weak. All the castles and crowns you build and place upon your head, may they all fall and come crashing down around your feet. May your company be of humble insignificance. May your weakness be your only source of pride. What you do unto others, may it all be done to you. May your blessings be many, but not what you thought they'd be. When you look upon the broken let mercy show you what you could not see. May you fight for all your life for what is true."

Its been too long...

I have been a very unfaithful blogger recently. So unfaithful that I am pretty sure everyone has stopped reading my blog and now I am just writing to myself. Which is alright. I can handle that.

I feel like a lot has been going on recently but nothing exceptional. Nothing worth writing a intense blog about. But maybe just a few of my recent observations:

Observation 1.

I really can't stand people who are convinced this weather is the result of global warming. I am pretty sure if it was global warming, it would be warmer. Perhaps global freezing is a better term. It is June and it feels like October...is something wrong with this picture? I should be putting my winter coat away not wearing it till it thins out. God, I want to wear my flip flops and not have cold toes!

Observation 2.

It is common knowledge that gas is at an absolutely ridiculous rate. And I would have you know that my truck is a very hungry guy. He eats a lot, and often. So driving around often really takes its toll on my bank account and I am beginning to feel that. I am pretty convinced we should go back the horse drawn carriage system, I mean that seemed to work out great and all you had to buy was carrots for the horses. I could definitely afford carrots.

Observation 3.

I am almost done with my first year of college. My brother graduated a few days ago and my littlest brother is going into seventh grade. The majority of my closest friends are getting married and others have landed awesome careers. I am definitely not a teenager anymore. It is a weird feeling getting older and watching other people get older. It makes me wonder what the next year and years are going to bring. More and more it seems like everything and anything could change in a week. Its very cool and yet very scary.

Observation 4.

I need a new wardrobe.

Observation 5.

There have been a lot of new relationships recently that I have loved attaining and also old relationships that have gone deeper. I love the way the Lord works and always brings the right people at the right time. I love love.

Observation 6.

My grandpa died a week or so ago and sadly I feel like I learned more about him at the memorial then I actually did when he was alive and for that I am sad. But I also found out what a good person he was. I didn't even know he was a Christian, and yet at the memorial I foudn out that he was the head usher at his church and really, really loved the Lord. And his last words to some of his friends were "yes, I am ready to see my Jesus." I LOVE that. He was 6'4, and when he was his full height, with his cowboy boots on, he easily stood at 6'7. He was a giant of a man but also a big teddy bear. He loved camping, horseriding, hunting and fishing. He loved people and he loved being in the police department. One story I will leave you with about him: he was a trucker for several years and one time as he was driving a truck in front of him ran into a goose. Well my grandpa immediately pulled over thinking "what a great dinner that would be." SO he grabbed the goose and threw him in the cab of his truck. He was driving about ten minutes when all of the sudden the goose woke up and preceded to attack my grandpa. This went on for while [gooses are pretty vicious you know], but my grandpa finally won and I assume had a delicious dinner :)


Thats all teh observations for now. More to come much sooner than later :)

Taste my encounter....

I was listening to Kris Vollotan [the assistant pastor of Bethel Church] and some things he was sharing on the cd I was listening completely blew my mind and you all need your minds to be blown as well....

Did you know then anything you do...whether its painting, preaching, dancing, writing...whatever it is, whatever your gift is, if you do that thing and in the midst of doing it, you have an encounter with God, then that opens a vortex for the same encounter to happen to people who see it. Did I just hear you say "wait, what?" Let me explain. Lets say I am painting a painting. Lets say that as I am painting this painting I have an encounter with Jesus. He comes and He wrecks me with His amazing, extravagant love. Well, as I paint, I paint out of this encounter. When I am done with this painting I hang it up on a wall...maybe even in a public place. And as it is hanging, people walk by and look at it and as they look at it they begin to encounter the amazing, extravagant love of the Lord. There is something on my painting that becuase I did it out of an encounter, opens a portal for people who see my painting, to experience the same encounter I had when I painted it!!!!! Does that blow your mind or what!!???!?!?!?! It blows mind. Everything we do out of an encounter invites other people to have the same encounter. I don't know about you but that makes we want to always be in some kind of an encounter with Him so that when people see me they always have an encounter. COME ON JESUS!!!

God is so awesome. He is so amazing. If we all could just catch a small glimpse of how much He loves us then there would be absolutely no stopping us. If we knew how much He loved us then fear, doubt and unbelief would never be an issue. We would never stop to think about consequences of doing something for Him, we would never weigh the pros and cons, we would always just JUMP. I want to experience the love of God...the kind of love that you need to brace yourself for. The kind of love that changes you, really changes you forever. Thats the kind of love I want to know...the kind that after you feel it, you'l never be the same, you'll never be the same again!!!! If a handful of people knew how wide, how deep, how long His love is for use...we truly would change the world!

...

um...The Shack was amazing....and if you haven't read it...READ IT. That is all...for now. :) Well, maybe a quote from the book...just to wet your appetite...

"A birds not defined by being grounded but by his ability to fly. Remember this, humans are not defined by their limitations, but by the intentions that I have for them; not by what they seem to be, but by everything it means to be created in MY image"

100 more things...

Kaylee, you were right, this is way fun...and way easy...and i am bored so here are some more. More for my entertainment then yours but if you enjoy random facts then you will enjoy this...

1. Seeing as she inspired this whole thing I will begin my first point with a shout out to my BFF Kaylee, whom I love more than life but only wish she was living right here by me.
2. When I was five my name was written in the sky by a plane for my birthday
3. I have always lived in Seattle and never forsee myself moving elsewhere
4. I love Norman Rockwell
5. I love accoustic music...usually live sessions are the best.
6. I despise the cold
7. I have to sleep with at least three different blankets...I like to feel enclosed
8. I was a lifeguard for three years
9. I do NOT do well with blood- my whole body goes numb at the sight or even the mention
10. I have lots and lots of guy friends, only a few girl friends- trying to fix that
11. I have done a life siege at the nations capitol with Lou Engle
12. I have artwork at the Smithsonian
13. I love vans [like the shoe, not the car]
14. I have never been to Walmart
15. I love In And Out
16. I hate camping
17. I am really close with my moms family, not so much with my dad. Probably because my moms family lives by New York and on the beach and my dads family lives in redneck Washington...but don't worry I am not shallow.
18. I love tank tops
19. I love sunglasses
20. The first rated R movie I watched was Patriot.
21. I have a dog named Chase, a bunny named Lola, a bird named Kiwi and lots of fish searching for identity.
22. When I was in third grade I had a pet fly named Joe...and Ryan smashed him
23. I love dreaming
24. I love using my imagination
25. When I was a kid I sleepwalked like crazy and up until two years ago my parents had to lock me in my family camp tent to prevent me from leaving in the night
26. I couldn't sleep away from home until MCs
27. I shot a crow in MCs at the Stevies house...that was the first animal I have ever killed.
28. But I killed a lot of insects...I used to fry ants with magnifying glasses ALL the time
29. I was addicted to rollerblading
30. I wish I could sing
31. I want to write a book...fiction
32. I love babies
33. I love staying up late and sleeping in the morning...if I go to bed before nine I feel like i wasted my night, but if i wake up before 8/830 I tend to feel sick
34. SOmetimes I just like to stare
35. Big animals terrify me
36. My first dog was a black lab named Rozlyn and she would escape and somehow always manage to bring back some type of food...a can of this, a bag of pasta, a stick of butter...to this day I don't know where she got it.
37. I don't like rubbing my hands over carpet or fabric for too long
38. I love it when people play with my hair or rub my back
39. I can't stand massages...they hurt
40. I drive a truck
41. I am a pretty mean roller blader
42. I don't like baths
43. I love swimming
44. I enjoy making peoples day
45. I like remembering stuff about people that they never thought i would remember
46. I like surprising people with things...but i am not easily surprised
47. I have really blonde hair on my arms so I am frequently asked if I shave my arms
48. I love the smell of vanilla...or a really good mens cologne
49. I am not very domestic
50. I like scrapbooking
51. The only soda I will drink is Coke or Vanilla Coke...get everything else away from me
52. I do not like pizza on the west coast...give me a peice of New Jersey boardwalk pizza anyday
53. And yes, that is "soda" not "pop" and most definitely NOT "soda-pop"
54. I love finding new coffee shopes and will never get tired of searching for them
55. I take a really REALLY long time to drink anything....and if i drink something it needs to be in small quantites
56. I hate getting ready....so i have it down to an art, I can get ready in twenty minutes...max
57. I don't like camping...have I mentioned that already?? Well I dont
58. I have always wanted to live in a penthouse in New York...but who hasnt?
59. I saw Phantom of the Opera on Broadway
60. I am a huge procrastinator...its a problem
61. I love to read fiction
62. I love macaroni and cheese
63. I love blues
64. I love the smell of vanilla...its nummy
65. I went to Mrs. Jarvis for preschool. We ate vanilla wafers and bananas everyday for snack. I am still obsessed with vanilla wafers, but i strongly dislike bananas
66. Some people say I look like Uma Thurman, some people say I look like Cameron Diaz. I dont agree with any of them.
65. I used to play piano in worship band
66. But now I am not musically inclined at all
67. I played imaginary games everyday
68. Sometimes, when I can't sleep, I re-enact an entire soccer game in my head
69. Me and my brother were lego masters
70. I hate being the center of attention
71. I love laughing...but don't like my laugh
72. I want all my kids to play sports
73. I twitch uncontrollably when I am trying to go to sleep
74. I love watermelon sour patch kids
75. 4th of July is my favorite holiday...followed closely by Columbus Day...lol, jk
76. I first started painting a year and a half ago
77. I have been drawing since kindergarden
78. I love worship songs with hand motions
79. I like wearing white...but I ALWAYS spill something
80. I used to sit on my roof for hours when I was a kid, just day dreaming
81. I always thought a woman got pregnant when she kissed someone for the first time
82. So I never wanted to kiss anyone
83. I can't stand to be around flirtatious people
84. Or people who ask silly questions ALL the time
85. I love the sun...warm sun
86. I have a book written about me. Its called "Happy Birthday Morgan" and my Papa did it for me on my fifth birthday.
87. I like hats...especially trucker hats
88. I want to be on an adult indoor soccer team and a softball team
89. I worked in a daycare
90. The first time I was ever "asked out" was by the captain of the Woodinville Football team who I worked with at the daycare. His name was Cory and was actually really cute...but I turned him down. Now he is about to be drafted into the NFL.
91. I should be wearing glasses
92. I have WAY more guy friends then girl friends...and thats the way its always been
93. I love thai food
94. I never want to "grow up"
95. My favorite scripture is Psalms 24.18 "Who may ascend the hill of the Lord? He who has clean hands and a pure heart...."
96. I once read the entire Bible in a month...I was betting someone I could
97. I love coke in a bottle
98. I have always wanted to be on Amazing Race
99. I can't wait to see what life is going to be like five years from now
100. I love the life I live

Some new revelations...

The other night at Revival Culture prayer the Lord wasdownloading into my spirit some major revelation on Revival itself. I realized how often I pray for revival but don't really expect it to come. I often expect it to come in someone elses life, or after I am dead, or in five years, or at the very least tomorrow. But what is stopping revival from coming NOW? I think a lot of the reason revival doesn't sweep us up in this moment is because we don't actually believe it will or that it could. We have so much unbelief and doubt. Revival is a great thought, it even makes for a great prayer- but when it comes to actually seeing revival, I will be honest, I don't believe it can happen tonight. But I have been coming to a place where if God wants to move right now, in this very moment...then I want to be on His side. I want to believe that God is big enough to use me in everyday life, you know? Even on those days when I am not having a great day. I want to believe that God could turn a nation, even if we have a hardcore liberal for a president. I want to believe that all of my dreams will come true because His promises are yes and amen. I think too many people hold a grudge against God for not fulfilling certain promises to them, but really those people didn't ever believe He was good enough to fulfill those promises. What would our world look like if everyone, even just a small handful, believed in the power of their belief. If faith as small as a mustard seed can move a mountain, I must have a pretty small amount of faith, because I don't even believe I could move that piece of sand. God I believe...help my unbelief!!

Copying Kaylee....100 things!

100 Things

1. My name is Morgan Elizabeth Gilbert
2. I am named after my great grandma, Elizabeth- it means "Consecrated to God"
3. One of my daughters will have Elizabeth as her middle name
4. I currently live in Woodinville WA
5. I have been to New Jersey over 18 times
6. I LOVE the beach...if I wasn't so connected where I am there would be nothing keeping me from living there permanently
7. I am a definite city girl...wide open spaces intimidate me, except the beach of course :)
8. I like summer best but I like winter during Red Cup season though at the Bucks
9. I work at Starbucks
10. I have a huge issue when it comes to receiving things from people...I like blessing people more :)
11. I have a lot of awesome friends but a few GREAT friends!
12. I love ministering to youth...especially girls and would waste my life to see freedom in others
13. I am a youth leader in my youth group
14. I love painting! Especially prophetic painting.
15. I love to doodle...Everything I have is doodled on in some way or another
16. I love kids books...my favorite is The Princess and the Kiss
17. I love Jesus!
18. I go to Red Robins at least once a week....because burgers, fries and milkshakes are my favorite food
19. I love one on one time with people...big groups make me nervous
20. I love hot brownies and vanilla ice cream
21. I am addicted to team sports
22. I played soccer for four years, basketball for three and I LOVE volleyball
23. I don't like excercising...except for when I am playing a sport
24. I was a lifeguard for three years
25. I love washing cars in the summer
26. I hate cleaning
27. I love wearing casual clothes...i dress like i want to be on the beach
28. Flip flops are the best thing ever invented
29. I like to dress up...but only for really special occasions
30. I have blue/gray/green eyes- they change depending on what I am wearing
31. I have blonde hair...but yes it is fake. My natural color is brown
32. I am 5' 6" - I don't like wearing high heels because I feel to tall
33. I love going on long drives
34. I almost got hit by a train for my first accident
35. I have been to Italy and I fell into a canal in Venice
36. I will own my own coffee shop one day
37. I love acoustic music
38. I like cheesy movies...
39. I have to sleep with noise and a night light...but I am not scared of the dark
40. I do not sleep well at night so I usually sleep until 10
41. When I was little I used to want to be an artist or a motorcyclye repairman
42. Now I just want to be an artist
43. I love to read fiction...Ted Dekker is my favorite. I have read Blessed Child like 20 times
44. I don't like to show emotion in real life...but I cry in almost every sad part in most movies
45. I am a very visual person
46. I like hugs
47. I love 24, LOST, Heroes, Hannah Montana and Extreme Makeover
48. My ideal night is a few of my best girl friends, a couch, ice cream and a good movie [kaylee...i could use you not to be in ND anymore for this :)]
49. I went to Christ Church Academy and I went from K - 12 with basically the same 10 people...and I love them
50. I was a student in the Masters Commission from 2005-2006
51. I was an extern in the Masters Commission from 2006-2007
52. I LOVE the Masters Commission
53. I have to have a snack before I go to bed
54. When I was seven I stole a pack of gum from every big convenient store
55. I want a tatoo but I will probably never have one
56. Most of my closest friends live in different states
57. I love rainy Sundays
58. I am the only girl out of five kids
59. I am my grandpas favorite as I was his first grandkid and his only grandaughter
60. I hate homework
61. I bite my fingernails but I really want to stop
62. Fiction, art and movies speak to my spirit more than a self-help book or a good message
63. I want to paint a picture that can change the world
64. I want to teach other people to believe they could paint a picture that can change the world
65. I love ministering to hearts
66. I love seeing miracles
65. I like to dance in awkward situations
66. I like to sing but it does not sound good
67. I like listening to Hawk Nelson when its sunny outside
68. I love finding awesome coffee shops
69. I love downtown Kirkland
70. When I was a kid I was a "tomboy"
71. I could make a fort better than all of the boys in my neighborhood
72. We all got pocket knives when we turned ten
73.I like to talk in weird voices
74. I hate cooking...I have burned water
75. I don't like vegetables
76. But I love Brussel Sprouts
77. If I don't talk to my mom everyday I feel icky
78. I like putting sour patch kids in buttery popcorn
79. I love movies
80. I have lots of nicknames: Morgue, Morgy, Mo, Mo-G, Lizzie, Liz, Morgs, Shmorgesborg, Smores, Rev, Sissy...and I answer to more than just that
81. I like staring into nothingness
82. Sometimes I pretend I am CIA
83. I am a very independent person and if I don't have more than an hour to myself everyday i kinda freak out
84. I need coffee everyday
85. I have to eat small quantities of food abot ever hour or I get really sick
86. SOmetimes I can't tell the difference between blue and black
87. I love randomness
88. I want to play the guitar
89. I want to love and be loved
90. I love flying but I am afraid of heights
91. I would rather a million people walk all over me than one person walk all over you
92. I am scared to give my heart away but when I do its for real
93. I want to spoil all my friends kids
94. I never want my kids to know when I have a hard day
95. I love my brothers and often wonder what it would be like to have a sister
96. I like to see people smile
97. I want to get married on a beach...but will settle for having a reception there
98. I love America and would rather go to New Jersey on the beach than anywhere in Europe
99. I want to leave an impact on this world
100. I want to do the will of God in my generation

A night at youth group...

Beginning. How can one word implies so much? Its a word full of anticipation, full of suspense, full of excitement, full of mystery. The word beginning automatically pricks the ear…what is it a beginning to? A story, a song, a poem, a dream, a life, to a day, to a year, to a breath. Every second has the potential to be the beginning of something new as well as the end of something old. With the passing of each moment is the power of potential. So with the pronunciation of the year of new beginnings what is being unlocked and released in my story? What in my life still needs to begin? What chapter needs to start and which chapter needs to end? When I look back on my life where will my “Once upon a time” start? What do I want to be remembered? What is my story look like this year?

Once upon a time there was a girl who did not know the power of her dreams. She did not know why she was created or why she walked every day from one route to another route, knowing it was for a purpose just always wondering what that purpose might be. And that girl was me. I was like a coke bottle, shaken and shaken and shaken…waiting to be released, knowing I was meant for more than just to be in the bottle but fear of the unknown caged me inside this bottle. I did not know that I was created for more, I was created to affect lives, I was created to spread and touch everything around me. I did not know that I could change the atmosphere around me. I made a vow, made a commitment one day that nothing would hold me back anymore. Lids that I put on Myslef and lids that other people put on me would no longer be able to cage me in and hold me back. I was called to live outside the box…to live outside the bottle. I was called to burn the box and perhaps help other people burn their boxes as well. I was called to be released. And so in the year of new beginnings I am letting myself believe that it is possible. I am letting myself believe in the power of my dreams. I believe that out of intimacy with my daddy, and always beginning each moment knowing that it belongs to Him, I will be released into a greater freedom in my life. I believe that the dreams that He has given me are from Him and He desires to help me fulfill them. I believe I believe that I could paint a picture that could change the world. I believe that as I walk in obedience to His voice, each chapter in my life, each beginning, including this one will be better and more exciting than the one before it.

So what did the year of New Beginnings bring for that girl? Well, the lid of that coke bottle came off. And the fluid inside that was shaken was released and the whole world saw what becomes of someone who lets themselves be stirred up for the things of Christ and then also lets themselves be released! It is uncontrollable and the impact undeniable.

All growed up....

I remember when a good Saturday morning entailed nothing more than waking up, grabbing a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, curling up on the couch and watching a rousing half hour of power rangers, followed by Rugrats, then Doug, then Hey Arnold, then Catdog, and my PBS favorite Arthur. It was in those times I was convinced Heaven invaded earth through a tv screen. Nothing could ever get better then me, my tv, my cereal and my couch. That was until the chore bell rang. And when the first words out of my mothers mouth was "Who didn't clean their room?" I suddenly knew that Heaven had came and slipped so easily through my fingertips with the turning on and off of a little button that my parents controlled. And it was then that reality set in for a little 10 year old girl. There were bigger things to be dealt with then what to watch during commercial break. There were things like cleaning your room, feeding the dog, finishing homework and maintaining peace amongst my age group of kids in the neighborhood. It was a large world when I was just 10 and the beauty of it all was that I still believed that I could do something to change it.

Now Saturdays are a little more complicated. 10 short years later and I find myself all "growed up". Now on Saturday mornings I worry about waking up early, not for cartoons but for a 600am shift at work. I no longer have Cap'n Crunch, just four shots of coffee to get me going. I do chores still but cleaning my room is at the bottom of a very long list. I still do home work, but college is a little harder than lifepacs. And the one relief is I don't have to worry about neighborhood peace anymore as all my little buddies moved away, now I just have to worry about peace in everyones lives, all around me, everyday. And tomorrow, well tomorrow one of my best friends gets married. Only ten short years ago we were afraid of boys...running away screaming "Cooties, Cooties!!!" And now we are running towards them singing "Cuties, Cuties!" Well Elise is getting married and I am officially feeling like my cartoon watching days are over. Its a sad day when you realize those are gone. I may, in my stubborness, try to hold on to them until I get married and absolutely HAVE to lay them down...we will see. :) But when you see a chidhood friend, a best friend, marry another guy, well it just makes me realize that times goes fast. Seasons in our life go really fast. Friendships come and go and change. People are added, people are taken away. Desires and dreams change. Responsibilities change. But even with all of that...life just gets better. I think I am happier now than when I was 10. I was definitely innocent back then but now I am just happy to be living this life. I am happy to be surrounded with all the people I am surrounded with. I am happy for my friends..and those few who have been with me through it all and those few who I know who will be with me forever. I am grateful for all the experiences. I am grateful for what is yet to come. I am only twenty. Two decades old. I have got a long ways left to go. I have a family of my own to begin one day, a dream to fulfill and hundreds of lives to breathe Gods breath into. I know one thing for sure...I am more excited about life nowthen I was when I was ten. I have a great anticipation and expectation for the rest of the journey. And you know what? I still believe I can do something to change this world.

Thoughts...

Earlier today I was reading this silly "hope quotes" in the grocery store [just don't ask]. I was just reading it for pleasure but one quote stuck out to me and I haven't been able to shake it since. I dont remember the exact wording but the idea behind was that if I was the only one on earth, if God had created just me, then He wouldn't have minimized the beauty of Creation- He loves me so much that if I was the only one, it still would have been worth it for Him to create this earth. It still would have been worth it for Him to send His son to die on the cross. And my mind cannot fathom that!! I can't understand that kind of love...but I like it. Last year we listened to a prophetic word discussing the love of God and why He does what He does, and all the guy kept saying over and over again was:

"Because He loves you, because He Loves you, because He loves you, because He loves you, because He loves you, BECAUSE HE LOVES YOU!"

And then we sing songs like "Oh how He loves us" all about Heaven meeting earth like a sloppy wet kiss. Well its my thought that before all of heaven invades all of earth, then all of Him must invade invade all of me. So I guess I should be asking Him to give me a sloppy wet kiss. I want to get wet in His love!! I want to dance in it. Most of all I want to believe it. I think when we truly recognize how much we are loved and how much authority we have because we are sons and daughters then we will truly be unstoppable. Because who is gonna try to stop someone who doesn't care to lose because they have already lost it all for Him. I LOVE YOU DAD I LOVE YOU DADDY!!!

Power of Gifts...

I have had this thing with wings for the past couple weeks. Just a fascination with what they mean. As I was painting this picture and the Lord told me what I was painting He kept on saying, "I have given you wings...please use them to fly!" It just made me think about all the gifts he has given us...and He has given everybody something. But we can use those gifts for His Kingdom or we can use them for ourselves. If someone has been given wings with the sole purpose to fly, then never stepping off of a cliff and flying is a sin. I want to make sure that the gifts God has given me I am not only using them but I am using them for the very thing that He intended. And that makes this my dream: to paint a picture that could change the world. And so with every stroke and every line, with every color and sketch, I hope to attain a smile from my Daddy!

Daddy, do you like what I create?

Sometimes I find myself wondering where I am going and what I am doing and if anything is making a difference. And it's in those places where I can chose insecurity or I can chose to remember... I can chose to remember who created me. I can chose to remember who built a dream for me. I can chose to remember who loves me unconditionaly. I can chose to remember Him...my Daddy. Its in those times when I ask "Daddy, do you like what I create?" And then I feel him smile and laugh, and say "Of course dear!" When the Bible says "God sits in the Heavens and laughs" I am pretty sure He is laughing at me. He is laughing at me becuase I forget so many times that He has created me for Himself. He laughs at me becuase I was created for His joy. He laughs because I run into poles and I say things that tend to not make sense sometimes. He laughs because I like the words "lollypop' and "cupcake". He laughs at me becuase I would eat Red Robins fries and a Rookie Magic Monster Milkshake all day long. He laughs because I paint with my fingers and I get funny twitches during worship [I think He did that on purpose]. He laughs because He is my Daddy and He enjoys me...just like He enjoys you. And that make sme happy. And that makes it my goal to "Love the Lord and enjoy Him forever!"

I am so overwhelmed...

I am in a place right now where I am so completely overwhelmed with the goodness of God. There are so many things I want to say, that I want the whole world to know about Him but I don't feel like there are enough words in our language to articulate accurately the goodness and awesomeness of who He is.

This last week He has blessed me with the incredible opportunity of being at the Prophetic and Arts Conference down in Redding CA. I had been wanting to go to this conference for several months now but it a lot of circumstances came up and about ten days ago I was convinced that going to the conference was out of the question. I didn't think I could afford it and well, it was sold out. That definitely would put a damper on things. But last Friday my parents told me that they felt like it was the Lord for me to still go, and so, not knowing if I would get in or not, I went to Redding California.

I was going to meet Kaleb and Jerbarco down there because they too were attending the conference. The first night [a wednesday], Barco hadn't flown in yet and so I go to take his spot. Brian and Jenn Johnson led worship and Kris Vollaton spoke. I could spend a whole blog just talking about what he spoke on because the words he spoke changed my life. In brief He spoke about living from eternity and how we have an obligation to our forefathers [dating all the way back to the old testament] to fulfill a destiny that they prophesied but to also prophecy and call into existence the destinies of generations to come. And that was just one point....

That night we talked to the head usher, who we knew from Firestorm, and he said that there was absolutely no chance of me getting in the next day. There as nothing they could do for me. At this point I began wondering why the Lord sent me down there. I knew there was a reason I just could not, for the life of me, figure out why He needed me to spend all the money, and the time to go to California just to "hang out." But thats what I did. I slept in on Thursday, Amanda Cradduck picked me up, we went to coffee and then back to her house to play old school nintendo. It was fun but I definitely was still waiting for the reason I was down there.

That night, through different circumstances that came up, God came through and I ended up getting a badge. I was SO excited. I would get to see Akiane, the child prodigy. So we got in and Kim Walker led worship [which is always amazing] and we got to listen to Akiane, who is thirteen years old and on fire for the Lord, talk about her painting and her poetry. Below is one of my favorite paintings of hers...So that night Akiane ended and I wondered what they were going to do next. It seemed random to me, almost out of place, but Pastor Kevin Dedmond got up and announced that they were going to do some healing ministry. So he had all his team come up and pretty much every attendee in the conference flooded the altar for prayer. Jerbarco, Kaleb and I just stood in the back because none of us needed healing. But it then we remembered Kortney Grace who had just been diagnosed with breast cancer. Surely if this was an annointed time for healing, then why not? So I called her and asked her if we could bring her to the front for prayer. As I was talking to her Pastor Kevin Dedmond said that he felt there as a special annointing for people to be healed of cancer, and if someone in the room had cancer to go to the stage. So I grabbed on to Jerbarco, still on the phone with Kort, and he plowed through the mosh pit of people and we finally ended up at the stage. One of the head guys form the shcool of the supernatural came over and prayed for Kort. We all listened, eagerly anticipating what was going on on the other side of the phone. After a few short prayers Kortney Grace was completely healed of breast cancer!!! Praise God...I have never been so excited about anything in my life!!! God was just oozing goodness that night.

The next day was the last day and I had to leave that afternoon. So we got up to go listen to John Paul Jackson speak. He spoke on our gifts and how we all have gifts, and the gifts will work- they will work for the Kingdom or they will work for the world. But if they are used for the world eventually a perrson will be bound to those gifts and controlled by the limitations of the gift. BUt if a person uses their gift for the Kingdom, then there is no boundaries and there is limitless freedom to go anywhere and do anything with the gift.

It was an amazing conference. I have so many stories to tell, but time and space does not allot for so many accounts. If you want to know more details please just ask me. I am so full of faith for the move of creativity that we are going to see erupt. Watch out for it- its going to be huge. Pray against contentment. My prayer is taht I am always striving and always fighting for more of Him, more of His Kingdom in my life and more of my heart surrendered to Him! I feel inspired because I am beginning to believe that my Daddy likes what I create!!

My Best Friends Courtship...

So this is an account of the lovely courtship of Ryan Stevie and Kaylee Johnson from my perspective...Its the account of the drama, the turmoil, the butterflies and the love- or should I say "like" [or as it has come to be written around these parts: l**e]...Kaylee, this ones for you

Saturday Feb 9th Kaylee woke me up with a phone call. It was about 10 am and yes, I like to sleep. She just wanted to talk, like we usually do, and I noticed that she was in a very very good mood. I was trying to figure out why she was so happy but I figured it was her new sister. At this point, she didn't even know why she was so happy, she just knew it was going to be a good day. I oftened wondered during this conversation how a day could be "good" when it was -50 degrees outside and you just swept up a dead mouse into your dustpan, but Kaylee continues to amaze me. She mentioned to me that her parents were taking her out to dinner and neither of us thought much of it...

Then, I got a phone call around 430 my time. Its not uncommon for me to speak to Kay everyday, but twice a day is a little unusual. So she called, I answered, and then she freaked!!

"Morgan, morgan, Morgan, I am freaking out. My parents are being weird. They told me to go to Bismark to meet with them but they are being all weird about it and they won't let me drive with them? Why won't they let me drive with them? And Morgan, my hair- its working perfectly...my hair never works perfectly unless something big is about to happen!!! Its probably nothing, I just need you to tell me to calm down."

So I, being born into matchmaking blood, immediately new what these signs meant. Courtship. Its always the same...the giddyness, the beauty, the surprise and suspense. But...Kaylee had lied to me saying there wasn't any guy she liked so as my half of my mind was thinking about courtship, my other half was saying "Kaylee doesn't like anyone"

"Kaylee what do you expect to happen?"

"I dont know Morgan, I really don't"

"Well, do you think a guy is going to come and ask you to court." And as soon as these words left my mouth it hit me. It didn't hit me, it bulldozed me over. Ryan said he was going to Idaho for a Fire conference for a week and he would have left that day. IDAHO MY FOOT!!! And thats when I started freaking out. Of course I wasn't going to tell Kaylee this becuase then she just would have died so I kept it to myself. And as I was saying "Kaylee calm down" I was like "Oh my gosh...Oh Jesus..."

So we hung up. I told her she better call me and tell me what happened. She was at more peace and I was going nuts. Absolutely nuts. She texted me again and said "My mom grabbed her camera, she never grabs her camera...but its probably just to take pictures of Payton." And I though, but didnt say "Why would your mom take pics of Payton, your the photographer". I just said "Yeah probably".

I had to go to prayer that night and I had it all figured out in my mind. If she was just going out with her parents- just to chat, she would be done with dinner at about 930 meaning she would call me at 730 my time BUT if Ryan showed up she would either not call me or call me really late. So I was at prayer and the time just kept rolling by. It was 730, then it was 8, then it was 830, then it was 9, then it was 930 and finally it was 10...

By this time our prayer group had rellocated to Red Robin [our favorite joint], we were all starving and I was trying to get information out of Todd becuase I knew that if Ryan was in North Dakota Todd would know. But Todd excells at acting and wouldn't budge. So I just sat eating my fries and sipping my milkshake wondering what the heck could be happening in my friends life.


FINALLY, after texting her hundreds and hundreds of times later, Kaylee calls me. FINALLY. I ran out of Red Robs and was like "Kaylee, what is going on?" And then she was trying to be all nonchalant, like nothing ever happened. She said "What do you mean is going on?" I was like "Girl if you don't tell me right now what just happened to you I am not going to be happy." So she proceeded to tell me slowly but surely the story we all now know as the courtship of Ryan and Kaylee.

Then they told me I was sworn to secrecy for an entire week!! They made me promise not even to tell my mom. Not tell my mom??? I tell my mom everything!! But in Rys words "Morgan, shut your big yapper!" So I hung up with Kaylee trying to breathe and refocus myself so I could go back into Red Robs and pretend like I hadn't just found out the most amazing news ever. Todd texted me and simply said "foods here." [I had been starving earlier]. I walked into Red Robin and made eye contact with ROb and Todd who now knew that I knew. I gave Todd a high five [becuase Kaylee and him have this thing where she always says "give Todd a high five for me"] then I sat down and simply said "I lost my appetite." The whole dinner I was too excited to eat and no one would leave. Me, Todd and Rob finally pretended to leave so we could talk about it. I sat in my car, drove around the parking lot then got back out and me and Todd and Rob screamed at the top of our lungs. Laughing and giggling all night long. And then we kept our secret for a whole week...oh it was hard but we made it- it was all better when Kaylee walked in on Sunday morning and I got to hug her for the first time.

We had a blast with them, watching their new relationship grow. I am so happy, so happy for them. They are simply perfect together. I couldn't have picked anyone better for Ry than Kaylee and Kaylee definitely deserved someone as awesome as Ryan. They are immensely cute together and I am very blessed and honored to call them my friends. What a great great adventure this is going to be and I am so glad to be a part of it. Love you both!!

Just some thoughts...

Have you ever noticed that when you have a dream sometimes it is the hardest thing to hold onto. Sometimes I think of it like a little kid who wants a lollipop really really bad. She wants this lollipop more than anything in that moment. She is consumed by thoughts of licking and loving this sole piece of candy. The desire for the sucker only intensifies when she sees other kids with one. "Mommy, mommy please can I have a sucker??", she cries only to hear her mom say "Not right now, you have to eat dinner first." IN other words, she is not ready for the sucker. Suckers are good but only if its the right timing. SO are dreams. I believe that God wont reveal His dream to us until we are ready to handle the impossibility of it. Just like a little girl wanting a sucker I remember always wanting to know "what I would be when I grew up." I remember always wanting to do something that would change the world. I wanted to be a superhero. I knew what my passions were, I knew what I loved, but I didn't have a dream. A dream is only an idea until it is interlaced with the passion of Gods heart.
I've also noticed something else that happens when little kids get suckers. Other kids start gathering around this lollipop loving "friend" hoping that they too might get the key to the secret lollipop stash. Or if not a key then at least a lick so that they too can feel important enough to have a lollipop. Don't find your identity in other peoples dreams and don't let other people rob you of the power of your dream. It truly is yours. It was why you were created. If you have a dream then hold on to it as tight as you can. Let it fuel you. Let it motivate you. God has given it to you because it was the right time for you to believe the impossible. Other people might come and try to tell you that your dream is nothing more than a good idea and sometimes even the people with the best intentions can try to make you drop your dream. But hold on to it. Don't let it go. It's what makes you feel alive. It's that feeling you get when you can say "i was created to do this." That how I feel when I paint, when I draw. Its how I feel when I am ministering to a young girls heart. Yes. Yes. Surely I was created for this.

I got wasted....

So my Valentines day adventure....and let me tell you what an adventure it was. I will now re-tell the account of my day exactly as it happened

3.ooam- Alarm clock rings. Time to get ready for work. I showered and briskly left. It was early. Very very early. I blared Kim Walkers new cd and worshipped with the windows rolled down. "It just makes me so...silly" Haha. I picked up my agnostic cowoker and showered her with the presence of the Lord. Come on!!

4.30 am- Been at work for approximately twenty minutes. Me and my coworker are talking, she is always curios about my dating life and seeing as it is valentines day she was extra curios. I told her about courtship, I told her about my life and what I believe. She said that most "Christians" she met turned her off so quickly to God but she said that me and Braden [who I also work with] are giving "God a very good name" in her mind!! COME ON JESUS. He can heal the hardest of hearts!!!

11.00 am- off of work. So much coffee I don't think I am going to be able to sleep for hours. Text message from Todd "Its singles awarness day...we got to party"

11.00am-5.00pm- Much deliberation about our plan of action for the night. Was it movies and ice cream at my house or was it braving downtown seattle for a night on the town. Finally after much talking me, Todd and James decided to go downtown to meet up with Tyson, Jerbarco, Kati and Larissa. It was settled.

5.45 pm- My mom thinks it would be best if we take the bus so that way we don't have to pay for parking or stress about finding parking.

5.46 pm- I present the idea to Todd and James. We're a bunch of preps. We don't take buses. But it might be fun and it could be an adventure.

6.20 pm- Todd and James arrive at my house for our grand adventure. We hop into James' car with a $1.25 each in quarters. We felt like little kids going to a lollipop store...very giddy and very nervous. We decided to catch the bus at the 108st park in ride in Bellevue. So we drove for a good twenty minutes just to get to the place where we would catch the bus. While doing this we were listening to some major worship music. And you know that whenever worship music comes on me and Todd and James just can't stay sober...so yes, we got drunk. We sat in the park and ride, drinking Jesus, waiting for the bus to come.

7.07 pm- The 255 to Seattle arrives. We drunkily stumble out of the car and onto the bus. We talk ad get lost in conversation.

7.27 om- I look up. The streets look a little familiar. "Guys, why are we in Houghton, shouldn't we be going the other direction??". Looks of horror cross our faces. The bus was going the wrong way!! Whats a bunch preps to do. We don't ride the bus. We don't know its world. So after much thought we decided that buses go in circles so if we stay on it long enough we'll end up in Seattle.

7.45 pm- The 160th st exit park n' ride. We were the last people on the bus as the bus driver says "This is my last stop." Todd, showing the true sheltered boy that he is, inquisitively asks "Does that mean we have to get off." Duh!

7.46 pm- We are now off the bus standing on the side of the freeway. Surely another bus going to Seattle would come through. We looked at the little bus list on the bus pole and it said teh 311 bus would come at 7.57 and take us to Seattle. So we waited.

8.05 pm- No bus. Are you sure it said 7.57? We go look over at the sign again...oh wait, that bus only runs morning routes. It means 7.57 AM!! The aweful realization of our predicament hits us. We are stranded on the side of the freeway, no more buses are coming, our car is twenty miles away and all the people who could pick us up are out on Valentines dates or already in downtown Seattle. Hmmm.

8.1opm- Hmmmmm

8.11 pm- James decides to call our new friend Joshua Freshour. Maybe he could pick us up. He calls him and leaves a message.

8.15 pm- Me and Todd try walking through the bus stop wall. No luck. Then we try levatating off of the curb, still no luck.

8.25 pm- Joshua calls. He is going to be our hero!! He was getting ready for bed but he will come pick us up.

8.45 pm- After an hour of waiting on the side of the freeway our knight in shining armor [or a white focus] pulls up. Surely we are saved.

9.00 pm- We decide to go to the Rose Hill starbucks because our fingers are officially frozen. We get awesome delicious coffee and then back in Josh's car and onward to downtown Seattle [We WOULD get there!!]

9.20 pm- We arrive in downtwon Seattle. After all that work to take the bus, we stil lended up parking and paying for it. Oh well. We go find Tyson....Jerbarco had already fallen asleep. Then Kati and Larissa join us. Now what? We have to many minors in our group so we can't go to any happy hours so we just start walking around downtown. Nothing is open. We run into Chris and ROni. I think we interrupted a "moment" if you know what I mean.

10.00 pm - There is absolutely nothing to do. We are all cold and we are all hungry. So the new plan is drive back to my house. We ended up only actually being in Seattle for around a half hour...

10.30 pm- Back at my house. We had been listening to worship music and talking about revival on the way back. We were feeling the presence of the Lord so thick. Josh decided to take us all tho heaven. We grabbed hands and invited the Lord...

This is where I lose track of time. We had our eyes closed and I was trying to go to Heaven. I never suceeded but the strangest thing happened to my body. Josh was praying for us and he touched my forehead, right around the temples. AS soon as he did that my eyes felt like they were on fire!! The fire moves around inside my head- like God was purifying my mind and purifying my thoughts and purifying my eyes. My body started shaking uncuntrollably. I got so wasted! Everyone was out in the Sprit. I just layed on teh couch not able to move because the presence of God was all over us. He was there all night!! We worshipped, we prayed, we prophecied. Oh SHABBA. Come on. Woah. We ended the night at about 2 in the morning.

I was tired. I had been up for twenty three hours. I woke up this morning still drunk. Actually I am drunk right now I think. Woah. COme on. Haha.

Lord I just release your power over anyone reading this. Woah. Come one. Woah. Just your heart to Him...let Him invade you. Come on. SHOOBA. Woah..Its all around you...its all around you..

A tribute to Valentines Day...

Since its Valentines and I am single. [happy and single for sure but nonetheless single] I thought to myself "I wonder where all my love goes to if I am not giving it to one person". I mean its got to go somewhere until the time comes for it to be lavished on one individual. SO I started thinking about all the things I "love". And to name a few:

- I love my family. I love all my brothers- even when they are screaming at the top of their lungs, wrestling all over my feet and stinking up the place. I love my parents...they're my heros and I trust them with my life. I feel empty if I don't talk to my mom everyday and my dad is my rock.

- I love my friends. I would start naming them but there are simply to many. Well what the heck [warning : I gots lots of love so I am separating into categories]:

Disciplers/Mentors
Veronica: my discipler and dearest friend. She has saved me from myself to many times to count. I would not be in the place I am today if it wasn't for her. I love her!
The Stevies: My second family!!! I love you guys so much. I would not have been able to do my MC year without you. Thank you for letting me be a part of your family and puting up with me through all my stuff. There is no family like your family!
Kelsey: my role model and constant guide. She has helped me through some of the toughest areas of my life and is one of my greatest fans. We don't talk nearly enough but she is always there for me and for that I am grateful
Biance: I am sure I tortured her to no end when she lived with me but I think that made her love me all the more. She is the complete opposite of me but continues to guide me in ways I didn't even know existed.
Candace: My sister forever and always. I could go for months without talking to her but we have a bond deeper than sisters. She knows me inside and out and I trust her completely
Hopie: One of my favorites!! Never have I had so much fun then when making mischief with Hope. I wish I was around her more, I wish I saw her more but I know that any time I do we can start right where we left off.
Growing up friends [and beyond]-
Kati- We've been through some rough times but its just made us stronger and closer. Too many good times to count...hair models all day long. I know we'll be friends for life.
Elise: So glad to be in her wedding!!! A friend who is a friend til the end. Doesn't matter if we talk everyday or don't talk at all. One of the loyalest and genuine people I have ever met.
Ryan: One of the best guy friends a girl could wish for. Loving protective and thoughtful. I don't know anyone who doesnt feel 100% safe around him
Tyson: A solid rock. He is always willing to listen and to be a shoulder when I need one. He's always been there and always will be there. A faithful, faithful man.
Rob: I can't believe this guy will eat anything!! He is a true brother though. He lived with my family during his MC year and our relationship has only strengthened since then.
Tiffany: I don't see her much anymore but we have a strong bond. From backyard tomboys to Jesus' princesses, its been quite the journey!!

...thats just a few

Now some MC friends:
Larry girl: My favorite secret spot partner. We've cried a lot of tears and laughed a lot laughs. Once an MC sister always an MC sister!!
Bryan: My crazy house brother. Will you ever move??? Haha!! Just like a brother to me. One of the fam forever!
ToddEH- From the first van ride where we got miserably lost in MCs to getting completely drunk in the spirit last week- a friend for life!
Connie- PP!!! Need I say more?
Aimers- Always a rock and faitfhul faithful friend!! I love you
Ricky- You were the best carpool driver!! I miss you and all of our conversations in front of the stevies house late at night!
Cami- My faithful, faithful intern and friend. You got me through some tough times and I will be grateful forever!! Now I just enjoy taking over the world with you!
Andrea- We had to much I think we should ahve gotten in trouble several times. SO many good memories with you- I cherish every one.
Melissa- I cherish your friendship! I never would have thought in High School that we would be as close as we are now but I am so glad we are.
Anna- It's been crazy. Now your courting Bryan. Magic must happen when you live in my house. Haha. Thanks for being steady and not holding any of those mean things I did against me.
Kara- Youa re such a woman of God!

And last years class...

Abby, Braden, Joel, Amanda, Ivory, Stephanie- You are all the greatest. I love you guys and so glad I got to spend some of thsoe awesome moments with you.

And this years class who I am still getting to know...

Erik- your my brother forever.
Levi- little brother- we have the coolest handshake!!!
Shaners- housebrother- I killed a crow!
Courtney- I love you girl!! More than you know!!
Kortie Grace- My sister twice removed in time...we shared the same bed and family. I love you and have enjoyed every moment of getting to know you
Charlli- You are precious and pure. I love you...you have beautiful eyes ;)
Elsa- You rock my world!! Can't believe how much alike we are...its almost scary!

And lets see...my youth group

Rachel- I LOVE YOU. You are my sunshine. You always make me happy
Anthea- You are so gangster I love it!! You seriously rock!!
Madison- So steady and so fun. I love every time I get to spend with you.
Addie- You have such a depth to you that not everyone sees. I love you girl!
Ashley- You are so fun. SO FUN. Buttercreamers all the way!!! I love you so so much!
Jordyn- You are so beautiful and pure. I lvoe it when you dance. It brings me closer to Him all the time.
Ramah- Your my girl forever!!
Morgan- Still getting to know you, but the bits I saw at Redding were out of control!!! You are so fun and hey, who can forget basketball season. Stealer of my name!! I love ya!

[don't kill me if i forgot you!!!]

Now for some new friends:
Julie- Its been a blast getting to know ya. So glad you came. Take over that fashion world!!
Chris- Your marrying my discipler which makes you my discipler. Your my brother for real.
Rose- Meow!! Your like my favorite find of the month right now!! I just love ya Drink with me anytime.
James- Its been so fun getting to know you! You've always been around but seeing the depths of you is so much fun!! Prophetic arts will change the world!!
Barco- Your my favorite black person!! Granted like the only one I know but still my favorite! Red Robs for fries??
Kaylee- Last but not least. I cherish who you are and I will love you forever!! Miles cannot separate us! Full moons and warm bread anyday girl. "If you just realize..."

WOW...I love a lot of people!! And there is probably way more that I missed!! Wow its refreshing just thinking of all those wonderful people!!

Hmmm...

I also love good food, good movies, good music. I love it when its raining outside and you have no where to go and you can snuggle up on a couch with hot cocoa. I love coffee. I love art. I love it when its that first day of summer and you don't need a jacket anymore. I love swimming in the ocean and feeling so small yet so free. I love living this life because God is SO good and He has me in His hands. Walking with Him is the best Valentines day gift ever, except we get to do it everyday!!! What a joy!!

Ok thats my very long tribute now I am done

"We are not DRUNK as you suppose"

The Doing's

So my life for the past couple days has been quite the whirlwind. Filled with adventure and turmoil, joy and pain, nights and days, experiencing the presence of God and the limitlessness of man. Through it all I have seen the goodness of God. I have experienced His love to the fullest. I have danced with my daddy to whatever tune played. Let me explain...

Exactly one week ago from today was Jesus Culture Redding. A group of us fearless leaders took about 25 10-12th graders to California for the best youth conference that exists! Let me tell you what an adventure it was. It took us a ridiculous amount of hours, driving in the stuffy white vans to finally reach our first destination: Medford, Oregon, where a loving church had opened their doors for us to spend the night. All of the girls slept in one room on the squeakiest cots EVER. If you even breathed through the wrong nostril these cots let you know about it. But we got over the noise because we didn't sleep there long anyways...just a short three hours. A nap really because then it was off to Redding.

Now I went to California with high expectations. I hoped to leave the dreary winter behind me and pursue a life of warmth and flip flops. Surely the Lord did not want to withhold one good thing from me on this trip...but to my dismay there was no warmth. There was no sun. There were no beaches anywhere in sight. There was only snow...lots and lots of snow. Five feet of snow easily graced the banks of the passes as we drove through them. We were all dumbfounded because of course we start to slowly die when we get a mere three inches. You can only imagine what five feet of snow was doing to our nervous systems!! It wasn't pretty. But at he same time it was beautiful. Snow, I have decided, is one of the most beautiful things He created- perhaps that is why purity is linked to the whiteness of snow. But we finally emerged from the treachorous mountains and into the heart of our beloved city Redding.

We checked into our hotel at about 1 in the afternoon. We showered and took naps and got ourselves ready to experience the "Jesus Mosh Pit" as we like to call it. We went to JC and unfortunately our group had not checked in on time and the main convention center was sold out. We were stuck in the overflow room which actually took place at the church. There was live video feed of Dutch Sheets...and to our amazement, live video feed of worship. Now somehow they expected us to worship to tvs. We didn't really know what to do with that. Our stage was empty, our stage was bear...people had flooded the front to the "Jesus Mosh" for what??- to watch the t.v.s of Kim Walker leading worship 10 miles a way from us. Hmmmmm....definitely the most interesting worsip experience I have ever encountered. That kind of put the whole night on a interesting foot for me, and if I am honest that night I didn't get much becuae I shut myself down. All I remember from that night was traveling to my beloved IN AND OUT afterwards to have my much awaited, much drooled after DOUBLE DOUBLE ANIMAL STYLE!!!! Enough said...

The next morning we eagerly awoke and headed to the conference, wondering what they had planned for us that day. To our great delight they had arranged for Brian and Jen Johnson to lead worship- which was AWESOME!!! And then we went into workshops. There were two workshops, I don't quite remember the first one but the second one was awesome. The second one was led by a youth pastor named Scott who was absolutely hilarious!! He spoke on healing evangelism and it was awesome. We had all heard it before but he made it sound new and refreshing. And he let us encourage him by saying "milk that cow" or "shake that tree"- those lingoes have indeed stuck with us so that whenever we hear some good preaching you may hear some youth pipe up saying "MMMM MILK THAT!!!" Oh Good times. That afternoon we got Dutch Sheets- up close and personal. He talked about Revival!!! COME ON. He released us into our destinies and called out the passion in us. There is just something inspiring when a father figure calls out destiny in the generation under him. Its powerful and cannot be stopped by any force. He talked about how God is an everlasting God...meaning He doesn't only see what is ahead He also sees what was in the past. He can take any of our mistakes, any of our shames, any of the things we wish we could take back- He can go back and change those!!! He is not bound to time. He is not a man that He is subject to our faults. He can erase our past and put us into our destiny becuase He is an Everlasting God!! Nothing is to big, nothing is to great, nothing is impossible for HIm. We have no excuse not to create revival in anything and everything we touch!!!!

That night was when the fire came!!! Up to that night I had experienced the Lord in a very deep and sobering way. Sometimes when you realize that the Lord is in love with you, you can't move, you can't breathe, you can't talk, all you can do is sit and enjoy Him. And that was where I was until Saturday night- just enjoying the presence of the Lord and giving my all to Him!! The theme song of the conference that they sang over and over was "You Won't Relent" by Misty Edwards. That song rocks me! I hear that song and I can't do anything but fall on ym face before the Lord. "You wont relent until You have it all, my heart is yours....I'll set You as a seal upon my heart, as a seal upon my arm. FOr there is love that is as strong as death, jelousy demanding as the grave and many waters cannot quench this love!!...Come be the fire inside of me come be the flame upon my heart! Come be the fire inside of me, until You and I are one" And I would listen to it over and over again and just let the Lord take it all. And it was deep and it was cleansing and it was healing and it was beautiful. But the Saturday night was when the Lord let me get drunk!! Because we were in overflow we had all the School of the Supernatural students ministering to us and we were wrecked. I just remember sitting with Rose up in the front saying "God would You invade us...would You wreck us??" And He came and when you experience joy like that, love like that, you cannot and never will be the same. Its AWESOME. Whats more awesome is that its not an emotional high. Its not a weekend conference that we go to and never experience again. God is the same everywhere. His joy is the same. His love is the same. He's not a bigger God in Redding than He is in my room. He doesn't grow because of conferences. He is the same!! He is everlasting!! When I encounter God...that encounter sustains!! And its awesome!!

Three days ago i was in the ER experiencing something I hope to never experience again. But tonight I choose against my pain and went to homegroup and you know what I found out- God is the same. He doesn't change. He loves us. He cares about us. And He is GOOD! The timing might change, the setting might change but He doesn't. Just because in the last song you were swing dancing, and the song before that you were waltzing and now you are just slow dancing doesn't change the fact that you are dancing with your Daddy!!!